With gift bags like these, it really is nice just to be nominated

The swag-bags of Hollywood’s Oscar nominees continue to swell, with each piece of donated graft considered a shot at implicit or explicit celebrity endorsement and product placement. Imagine, for instance, what an opthamologist like Kerry Assil could do after giving even a minor celebrity a Lasik procedure, one of this year’s gifts. All of a sudden, you’re the “eye doctor to the stars.” (One hair-restoration radio advertiser is already using Matthew McConaughey’s endorsement. And Assil’s testimonials page is “Under construction”!) Resorts like the Mirage Hotel and Casino ($27,000 getaway package) and Starwood’s Bora Bora Nui ($8,000 package) can potentially brand their properties as celebrity hangouts. The staggering graft even elevates your fairly run-of-the-mill products, like LandRoller skates, Function urban-detox hangover kits, and Jordache jeans (with $5,000 14-carat gold-thread initials added, of course). The only thing more absurd than the ostentatiousness of the gifts, of course, is the notion that these pampered millionaires need anything at all, much less a new Lomanve bathrobe.

—Posted by Gregory Solman

Published on February 28, 2006 | Permalink | Comments (1)

A very Bengrossing, Benjoyable exhibition

The urge to combine the name Ben with other words grows stronger every day, judging by Philadephia’s Ben Franklin exhibition, which has brought a measure of “BENergy!” to the city. In the wake of not one but two celebrity Bennifers, can the name Ben even stand on its own anymore? The Stillers, Kwellers, Wallaces and Popkens of the world may be somewhat concerned, along with anyone who favors non-sucky headlines on ads. But maybe there’s something to this whole trend. While most combo-names (Bennifer, Brangelina) are objectively awful, others are something of an improvement on the original pair. As Stephen Colbert recently pointed out, smushing William H. Macy and Felicity Huffman together gets you the quite respectable Filliam H. Muffman.

—Posted by Tim Nudd

Published on February 28, 2006 | Permalink | Comments (1)

Jobs in which women are just raking it in

There aren’t many jobs in which women earn more than men on average. But advertising has some of them, according to a CNN/Money article that discusses a book on earnings and gender. In the category “advertising and promotions managers,” women earn an average of $42,068, while men get $40,144. The relatively few professions in which women typically out-earn men also include: legislators, motion-picture projectionists, funeral-service workers, crossing guards and aerospace engineers.

—Posted by Mark Dolliver

Published on February 28, 2006 | Permalink | Comments (0)

It's not that hard to get people to watch ads

One of life's universal truths is that it takes three of something to make a trend. Another is that it's easy to get people to do precisely what you want if you know just how to manipulate their neurons. With those two things in mind, we present today's New York Times ad column, in which Stuart Elliott and Julie Bosman have discovered the three trend-signifying instances of advertisers goading viewers into watching their commercials. First, of course, there was the massively lame KFC buffalo-wings ad that broke last week containing a not-so-secret code ("Buffalo"). Then there's a Home Depot spot, breaking today, that was voted on air by viewers. And third, Dentyne is having people vote for the ending of a commercial that breaks today by going to the Dentyne Web site. Participants will receive a free pack of gum, which is right up there—or down there—with KFC offering code-breakers $1 off a sandwich. As for us, we refuse to be manipulated until advertisers start to offer big cash prizes.

—Posted by Catharine P. Taylor

Published on February 28, 2006 | Permalink | Comments (4)

Homer really, really likes Maine potatoes

It is the dogged journalist unwilling to rest on his laurels who finds story ideas in episodes of The Simpsons. Here are the opening lines of a piece in this morning’s Portland Press-Herald: “The Maine potato industry got an unexpected prime-time plug Sunday night when Homer Simpson, America’s most famous cartoon glutton, endorsed the state’s spuds. In a subplot that had Homer’s bountiful body sporting tattoo advertisements for various products, ‘Eat Maine Potatoes’ was stamped across one arm. Homer, who was in bed, told his blue-tower-haired wife, Marge, that the tater reference wasn’t an ad, but a reminder. He then reached over the edge of the bed into a bag of—yup, ‘Maine Potatoes’—and started munching on one.” Now this is hard-hitting journalism. The story goes on to gauge the value of such a plug to the Maine potato industry. The writer, unwilling to leave any stone unturned, even places a call to Fox and is forwarded a statement from Simpsons executive producer Al Jean: “All of the Simpsons writers are huge fans of Maine potatoes.” We have a feeling that quote was meant—yup, sarcastically.

—Posted by Tim Nudd

Credit: Matt Groening

Published on February 28, 2006 | Permalink | Comments (0)

Bennigan’s: Acting one’s age is so overrated

Casual-dining chains like Applebee’s, T.G.I. Friday’s and Bennigan’s are upsetting places. Is it the bogus enthusiasm? The “flair”? The pretense of neighborhoody charm? The food? It’s hard to pin down. There’s actually an Applebee’s in the Bronx, about five minutes from my apartment; I hope I never have to go in there. Anyway, we read in Adweek this morning that Bennigan’s is celebrating its 30th anniversary. How are they going about it? “Internally, the company has dubbed 2006 ‘The return to cool.’ Television, radio and outdoor ads touting the brand’s 30th anniversary use ‘We refuse to act our age’ as a theme.” What does this “return to cool” mean for the Bennigan’s wait staff? They’re wearing “Leprechaun Rights” T-shirts as part of a St. Patrick’s Day promo. How cool is that? (Some of them may “act their age” while taking your order, but let’s hope not.) A new ad for Bennigan’s potato skins reads, “We thought we’d get your attention by showing you some skin.” Cool! Bennigan’s marketing chief is quoted as saying, “Nothing we’re doing is revolutionary.” Surely it’s only a matter of time.

—Posted by Tim Nudd

Published on February 28, 2006 | Permalink | Comments (2)

Bands that won’t hitch a ride with Hummer

You might think a band named Trans Am would be a good fit for a General Motors commercial. But the Washington, D.C., rockers bypassed a $180,000 offer for their song “Total Information Awareness” because the product was a Hummer. “We figured it was almost like giving music to the Army, or Exxon,” guitarist Philip Manley tells the Associated Press. Hummer also got the cold shoulder from Thermal and LiLiPUT, even though the latter band has been kaput for 20 years. “At least I can sleep without nightmares,” ex-LiLiPUTian Marlene Marder tells the AP. This wave of principle over paycheck was attributed to the Hummer’s atrocious fuel-economy figures, which hover near the single digits. That thirst for Middle East unleaded has earned the vehicle a Sierra Club Web site called hummerdinger.com, which asks readers to choose an appropriate theme song. Should Hummer’s ad shop, Modernista!, run out of soundtrack options, be advised that Ottmar Liebert is still available. Weighing in on the controversy, Liebert says the young rebels ought to milk the deal for a good cause. “Hell, license your music to GM for the hated Hummer H2, and give $10 million to the Integral Institute, and you will create a lot more change than by telling your agent, ‘Over my dead body!’”

—Posted by Richard Williamson

Published on February 28, 2006 | Permalink | Comments (4)

Yet another chance to work with a bunch of slithering, slimy worms

We’ve seen contests lately in which moviegoers are invited to create a poster for a new release. Universal Pictures is taking it a step further, inviting people to create a TV commercial for Slither, the upcoming horror movie from writer/director James Gunn. Visitors to the Slither Web site can click on “Slug It Out,” which takes you to a page of clips, music cues, sound effects and graphics you can use to build a customized Slither TV spot. The movie seems to be about soul-sucking leeches, so advertising professionals will naturally be drawn to the material. The winner stands to pocket $25,000 and see his or her work used in the official marketing campaign.

—Posted by Tim Nudd

Published on February 27, 2006 | Permalink | Comments (0)

For once, D.C. gets a movie premiere

It’s not often that the nation’s capital hosts a premiere of a Hollywood movie. But when the film is a satirical sendup of the power brokers that make this place tick, it would be foolish to ignore us, especially if you want buzz. Thank You for Smoking, the movie version of the Christopher Buckley book featuring a tobacco lobbyist, debuted Saturday night at an event sponsored by Capitol File, the Niche Media magazine that targets luxury consumers. (See the trailer here.) Lead actor Aaron Eckhart and director Jason Reitman showed up before the movie started to wish the audience many good laughs. The party continued later at Blue Gin, a swank nightclub in Georgetown where some of the real-life lobbyists and journalists rubbed elbows in the age-old power dance. Among those on hand: Dan Glickman, president of the Motion Picture Association of America, along with Judy Woodruff, former host of CNN’s Inside Politics, and her husband Al Hunt, the Washington editor of the Wall Street Journal. Real-life members of the “MOD Squad”—short for “merchants of death,” they’re the tobacco, alcohol and gun lobbyist/PR types who meet weekly for lunch in the movie—were seen circling the bar. Asked how it felt to be considered a “merchant of death,” Frank Coleman, svp of public affairs and communications for the Distilled Spirits Council of the U.S., didn’t miss a beat. He reminded AdFreak that alcohol is unlike tobacco. “In fact, study after study has shown that for many adults, moderate consumption of alcohol can be good for your health,” Coleman said. “No one ever said smoke a cigarette or two a day and you will live longer.”

—Posted by Wendy Melillo

Published on February 27, 2006 | Permalink | Comments (0)

For the man who's pimped everything

Anyone care to waste precious brain cells guessing how this soon-to-be launched product, “Pimp My Cubicle” will fare? In case you really can’t figure out its premise, I’ll help—it allows people to interior decorate their cubicles with bling for their keyboards (if I never saw the b-word again, I’d die happy) a miniature disco ball, gold pushpins ... It’s a funny idea for about the first minute, and then you have to ask: how long will people who pimp their cubicles keep their jobs? And who really wants to stare at leopard-skin fringe all day? Even plastering your cubicle with posters of Garfield sounds better. In the spirit of completely overthinking this entire entrepreneurial venture, one colleague commented,“a little late to the pimping game, they are.” And you thought AdFreak wasn't keeping track of such things.

—Posted by Catharine P. Taylor

Published on February 27, 2006 | Permalink | Comments (3)