Thanks for the animated afternoon, Turner Broadcasting! Seems the citywide bomb scare up here in Boston today was triggered by an outdoor publicity campaign for an Adult Swim cartoon show. Turner placed weird magnetic lights in strategic locations, like local bridges, and those devices were mistaken for bombs. People in my office didn’t seem overly concerned. They followed the developments on cable and wondered if the subways (closed briefly owing to the hoo-ha) would re-open in time for the evening commute. Only two things really unnerve Bostonians these days. One is that faceless Charlie dude on the rapid-transit tickets and the prospect of sharing his fate: trapped forever underground on the train (15 minutes in the Green Line tunnel feels like forever, trust me.) The other is the hapless Boston Celtics.
Yeah, like I don’t have better things to do than play with M&M’s new Character Creator, which, as the name implies, allows people to make their own M&M characters. I was first alerted to it yesterday when I was reading People magazine. (I mean, what woman could resist a cover featuring Tyra Banks in a bathing suit 30 pounds heavier than in her Victoria’s Secret days?) Anyway, the ad, referring people to becomeanmm.com, depicted Burt Reynolds as a red M&M. Not that I find the thought of Burt as an M&M very appetizing, but the site is mindless fun nonetheless.
Are Canadian creatives (or maybe Canadians in general) really horny? That’s one conclusion you could draw not only from Montreal tourism campaign we wrote about last April but also this new one, promoting Toronto, that’s running in alternative weeklies in U.S. cities within a driving distance. (Click the image to enlarge—the copy up top reads, “No thanks. I’m married.”) The Toronto campaign, created by DraftFCB (hey, no surprise there), has been controversial, at least among those people who don’t make up its target. Says this story in the Globe and Mail (which, as one blog points out, doesn’t interview any Americans in the story), “they have provoked homegrown descriptions from ineffectual to ‘ridiculous’ to ‘deplorable,’ due partly to some confusion over their message.”
Here’s an amusing two-page Fox News ad from the latest issue of Television Week. “Meet the Paris Hilton of television news,” reads the headline, referring to CNN’s Anderson Cooper. It’s unclear who’s meant to be more insulted here, Anderson or Paris. And wasn’t it Fox that created The Simple Life in the first place? I guess that’s what they mean by having a balanced view. Check out the Fox News anchors chortling about the ad here.
Is your sex life less than it could be? Are you open to discussing it with total strangers? Can you weather invasive questioning by people who may come off like cultists? If you answered yes to any of these questions, then visit MyCrappySexLife.com, which believe it or not is run by the Next Level Church in Fort Myers, Fla. Yes, the church’s billboards are upsetting to some people, but hey, this is a hip, culturally relevant church that claims “God wants you to have GREAT SEX.” Surely you can learn something from the NLC’s “six-week message series dealing with Relationships.” Pornography is one of the discussion topics, along with “Sex ... God’s Way.” Ordinarily I wouldn’t hold out much hope for projects like this, but I’m sure they’ll be employing the services of a cool youth deacon to “rap” with the parishioners. That should make a world of difference.
A cannabis-derived drug that fights obesity? A Reuters report on CNN.com says a British pharmaceutical company plans to start human trials of such a medication. Yes, marijuana is famously associated with the “munchies.” But a researcher quoted in the article says some of the 70 cannabinoids in the cannabis plant can suppress one’s appetite. Apart from its usual interest in the greater good of mankind, AdFreak hopes the research successfully brings the drug to market so we can see how an ad agency might advertise it. One suspects the creative department would embrace the importance of research as never before.
I guess I can understand John Mellencamp selling out to Chevy; he has a point about corporate radio not being interested in his newer music. But could someone explain to me what Ralph Covert is doing? Covert, who fronted the Chicago pop/rock band Bad Examples before finding greater fame as a tolerable children’s artist, has apparently written a song “inspired by” Rice Krispies. I’ll grant that songwriters can find inspiration almost anywhere, but the fact that the song, called “Box of Fun,” can be downloaded only from the official Rice Krispies site, and that the Kellogg’s cereal is sponsoring his new national tour, makes me suspicious of said “inspiration.” You can hear the song, which is actually quite listenable, here. But now I have to explain to my kids the meaning of “selling out” a lot earlier than I expected to. Yet another sign that rock, even in its most innocent forms, is dead.
Unlike American Idol, the Grammy Awards don’t give votes to the unwashed masses. But a Harris Interactive poll let 8- to 18-year-olds sound off about the artists and records they’d choose for prizes later this month. A plurality of the respondents said they’d vote for Mary J. Blige’s “Be Without You” as Record of the Year, while Justin Timberlake’s Future Sex/Love Sounds led for Album of the Year. (Those of us dismayed by the notion of 8-year-olds extolling an album with such a title are probably living in the wrong century.) Carrie Underwood was the top vote-getter in the best new artist category, and her “Jesus, Take the Wheel” led the Song of the Year standings. If the fogies in our audience are vaguely relieved that they at least know who these people are, can they say the same about Imogen Heap? She finished fifth in the Best New Artist category, behind Corinne Bailey Rea, James Blunt, Chris Brown and the aforementioned Underwood.
Imagine what it’s like to be the one and only Yaz, Carl Yastrzemski, and see your nickname usurped by a birth-control pill. It’s one thing to have a sythn-pop group called Yaz (short for Yazoo, actually), but of all products, what could be a worse association for an ardently Catholic athlete than a birth-control pill? If Spike Lee can (absurdly) sue a TV station for calling itself Spike, doesn’t Carl have a case for pharma royalties? In honor of my baseball hero, here are the real answers to the drug company’s Yaz FAQ: • What is Yaz? A Boston Red Sox Hall of Fame baseball player and a member of one of the most elite circles in baseball as the last winner of the Triple Crown in 1967. • How Yaz works: When “Ted Williams” is no longer effective, place “Yaz” in front of the Green Monster. Use throughout the summer months and early fall. Repeat for 3,308 games. • What to expect: 121 RBIs, 44 home runs and a .326 batting average. Results may vary. Contraindications: Using “Yaz” at third base is not recommended except in an emergency. • Additional advantages of Yaz: Seven Gold Glove awards for playing left field.
Make the Logo Bigger isn’t sick of Geico’s cavemen, and neither are we. In the next phase of the campaign, the main caveman has invited us into his very own Caveman’s Crib. As usual, he’s conflicted about this, and drops little insults here and there. He has a nice place, though—evidence that he’s doing OK, despite the world being against him.
Alas. What has GoDaddy wrought? As if Bob Parsons’ blow-by-blow blog detailing his tangles with network censors weren’t enough, he seems to have solidified the “banned commercial” PR stunt for cash-strapped advertisers on the hunt for cheap publicity. Sadly, it works. Here’s the game plan: Gin up an ad just offensive enough to be denied, then act outraged. Sometimes, though, it doesn’t ring true, as in the case of Booble.com, the sexy-time search engine that’s already raised Google’s ire. Booble, whose logo is as subtle as its pictorials, claims to have gotten the cold shoulder from CBS for a proposed Super Bowl spot showing “a woman catching her husband trying to secretly check out a few adult sites.” It would be surprising if CBS has even heard of Booble.com.
This spot has been making the rounds online for the last week or so, reminding people to donate to the World Food Program’s U.S. division. It shows Reggie Bush preparing to make a meal out of a football, and carries the tag: “Not everyone can live off football.” It’s certainly a memorable metaphor, what with Bush pulling a pigskin out of the fridge and squeezing and smelling it for alleged ripeness. No idea why they thought “Sympathy for the Devil” was a suitable soundtrack, though.
Seems everyone has to have their own angle on how to integrate the Internet into their Super Bowl advertising these days. Snickers has gone for the time-tested “cliffhanger” approach by posting a few seconds of an ad at snickerssatisfies.com. It shows two men hovering over a car engine; one of them pulls out a Snickers bar as they stare at the engine. To see the rest, of course, you have to tune into the game, though the setup doesn’t exactly have me on the edge of my seat.
Above is one of the new ads. Gizmodo has posted a bunch more. We heard about this first on John Hodgman’s blog, in a post titled, “Have You Seen These Crazy Ads for Macintosh Computers?” The actors are apparently a comedy duo known as Mitchell and Webb. So far, no complaints of smugness.
The agency G&M Plumbing prides itself on trailblazing, like when it followed Crispin Porter + Bogusky’s lead in developing a feature film despite having no script, no financing, no talent, no distributor and no interest from a studio. (Where is CP+B’s Burger King movie anyway?) Now, G&M is pleased to present its revolutionary take on viral marketing: the viral print ad. “We created a two and a half minute video of a print ad and then posted it on YouTube,” says Mickey Taylor. As we write this, the video has gotten 48 views, and has been “favorited” one time. The whole thing seems pretty foolproof. But just in case, the guys might want to call David t. Jones, maker of the viral cartoon, for advice.
Pity John Gilbert. The newly named CMO at TJX Cos. faces a tough marketing challenge. The company’s computer systems were hacked, and that may have compromised millions of customer credit- and debit-card accounts going back a full four years. The bad press is pretty ubiquitous. A class-action suit was filed against the company on Monday. So now, instead of thinking up new names for lattes at his former employer, Dunkin’ Donuts, Gilbert must devise strategies to keep the TJX brands (T.J. Maxx, Marshalls, Homegoods) from becoming synonymous with terms like “security breach” and “identity theft.” TJX chairman Ben Cammarata (shown here) even posted a video message on the TJX Web site to reassure customers, so you know things are bad. Come to think of it, I bought some socks at Marshalls not long ago. Luckily, when I checked my bank account, the balance was what I expected: $6.43. More than enough for a large with two sugars and a frosted coffee roll at Dunkin’.
There needs to be some kind of meeting about which foods align with which genders. Otherwise, the “unhealthy food = guy food” misconception will continue, to the detriment of all. For example: that Burger King spot from last year (which is still running), which shows a parade of men marching down the street, demanding to be fed like men. Instead of quiche and tofu, they suggest the new Texas Double Whopper, possibly the least masculine foodstuff this side of the Vienna sausage. Not only is its purported size obvious compensation, it falls short of the hype. What you get is two slabs of thin, flaccid beef and, if you’re me, near-volcanic indigestion. If that’s manly, then you can wrap me in a gamcha right now.
Here’s that Nationwide insurance spot with Kevin Federline that’s set to air during the Super Bowl this weekend and which, sight unseen, has apparently upset countless fry cooks across the country (or at least one oversensitive and publicity-seeking executive from the restaurant industry). It’s hardly worth all the fuss—though it’ll probably get a cackle out of the Us Weekly set.
OK, this new digital billboard idea is just plain creepy, but in a different way than that awful Orville Redenbacher spot. If you haven’t read the Times this morning, here’s the deal: Mini Cooper is going to send personalized messages to Mini owners as they drive by billboards in their hometowns, using a chip embedded in the key fob that alerts the billboard that an owner is driving by. (In case you’re wondering, the car owners in question have volunteered for the program, so it makes it less likely they’ll drive their car off the highway—which is, I suppose, a good thing.) While the idea is certainly attention-getting, to me it feels like an invasion of personal space.
I think we all knew that someday, the “sex sells” advertising mantra would be employed to promote the spaying and neutering of house pets. It should also come as no surprise that it’s happening in Kentucky, whose humane society is planning a series of “edgy” billboards to communicate the message to pet owners. Says a rep: “There are sex scenes on TV on any given day or commercials on condoms and birth control, [so] we figured it was completely appropriate to talk about safe sex when it comes to animals.” (Just not near schools or churches.) This campaign is a noble idea, but they’ve overlooked an obvious sight gag for their billboards.
This campaign certainly puts the “G” in guerrilla, since it requires people to put balloons on the tailpipes of cars. Engineered by a German environmental group, the campaign depends on each balloon expanding as the car drives around, inflating the message, “The world can't take any more CO2,” until the balloon pops. Via Ernie Schenk, where several other people have had fun with the concept.
Above is the trailer for the movie version of Aqua Teen Hunger Force, starring Master Shake, Frylock and Meatwad. As reader David points out, it shares the same basic gag as the Team America trailer from a few years ago. Likewise, the teaser trailer for The Simpsons movie used the same joke as the trailer for South Park: Bigger Longer & Uncut. It seems that the parody-trailer business needs some fresh ideas. I did find it amusing that the Aqua Teen Hunger Force movie comes from “the 1st assistant director of the 2nd unit of Hellraiser III: Hell on Earth” and “the production assistant of the training video ‘Know Your Fryer.’ ”
Amateur singers across America dream of being the next American Idol. Now, actors have their own competition, as Whirlpool is holding auditions to find the next Maytag repairman. “Whether he’s a professional actor, a non-professional actor, a real-life appliance repairman who has always dreamed of acting or is someone who has an undiscovered acting talent, the new Maytag Repairman will be energetic, young at heart and outgoing,” says Whirlpool’s Jeff Davidoff. “You can expect the character to have a more relevant look and contemporary feel.” Much as each American Idol does—as does Miss America, for that matter— the Maytag repairman makes more than 150 publicity and advertising appearances in any given year. Plus, you’ll be following in the footsteps of Jesse White (who played the role from 1967-88), Gordon Jump (1988-2003) and Hardy Rawls (2003-present). Auditions will be held in New York, Chicago and L.A. in February. And Simon won’t be there to stomp all over your dreams.
Some time ago, I proclaimed a commercial for Dannon’s Activia to be perhaps the most off-kilter spot in recent memory. Well, I take it back. I recently returned to the Game Show Network, and there it was. Bam—the first ad I saw—a mind-bending 30-second masterpiece from Activia (not viewable online, unfortunately) in which a mother and daughter discuss digestive regularity. Among the irregular elements: a parrot that squawks at inappropriate times. I think it says, “Rrregular! Rrregular!” (The sound is muddled.) The bird looks menacing, like it can’t wait to peck someone’s eyes out. But its performance is actually a lot more naturalistic than the zombified actresses, who smile, preen and emote in bizarre fashion. And speaking of strange Activia ads, what on earth is going on here? Nice bathroom scene! I’ll say this for Activia’s ads: They stay with you. (I know—a bad joke for a bad spot. Damn you, Activia!)
“I can’t wait to see what you’ve got planned for the next quarter.” “Elton John was the best you could do? No Bono?” “Was that a commercial for Caffeine Free Diet Coke?” “What a crock. I’m glad you’d never waste money like that.” “Cable’s out.” “We’re through. I’m marrying your brother. Hey! Isn’t that you on TV?” “So ... I guess Lee Clow wasn’t available.” “Payton Manning’s hot.” “Sorry, I dozed off. What’d I miss?” “The CareerBuilder spot was better.”
