Google phone: too smart for its own good

Leveraging my freshly forged ties to Sergey Brin, I’ve managed to get my hands on a prototype of the Google phone! (Hulu turned me down for a Beta subscription—something about “outstanding warrants.”) Anyway, this G-phone is a pretty sleek unit, very Mobile 2.0! The thing’s pure Google: It’s got my profile pre-programmed and anticipates my every call. I hit one button and got straight through to the John Edwards campaign, but before I could prank them, I was put on hold to the tune of “The Ann Coulter Song” (automated voice: “Hear more great parodies like these on YouTube, a Google company!”). Then the damn thing rang and a doll-like voice said, “I’m Talky Tina, and I’m going to kill you” (automated voice: “For classic TV clips and more, visit YouTube, a Google company!”). The screen then came alive with ads for Herb Alpert CDs and Dockers. My twin vices! Since I’m old enough to care about privacy, I tried calling Google to complain, but the screen began flashing, “No service.” It figures.

—Posted by David Gianatasio

Published on October 31, 2007 | Permalink | Comments (1)

Creepy secret message in Gorbachev ad?

New York magazine’s Daily Intelligencer today took a closer look at this Louis Vuitton ad with Mikhail Gorbachev (running on the back cover of this week’s issue) and promptly soiled itself. Apparently, the reading material sticking out of Gorbachev’s fancy bag says something like, “Litvinenko’s Murder: They Wanted to Give Up a Suspect for $7,000.” (Another site translates it as, “Murder of Litvinenko. Treason for $7000?”) Alexander Litvinenko was the ex-Russian spy who died of radiation poisoning last year, possibly at the hands of the Russian government. No one seems to know what the cryptic message means. Gorbachev was asked about it on a Danish talk show last week, but refused to shed any light. Whatever the explanation, it’s certainly the biggest Louis Vuitton ad mystery since people looked at this photo and wondered, “Why on earth does she have a shoe on her head?”

—Posted by Tim Nudd

Published on October 31, 2007 | Permalink | Comments (3)
Filed under Celebrity endorsements, Fashion, Louis Vuitton

Advertising helped Robert Goulet stay cool

Robert Goulet was cool. His trademark baritone and classic good looks propelled him to stardom in 1960, when he played Sir Lancelot in Camelot on Broadway. He made plenty of film, TV and stage appearances in the ’60s and ’70, but just when his popularity might have faded, his keen sense of humor and self-deprecation found favor with a new generation of fans. His ads for ESPN, and more recently Emerald Nuts (see above), showcased his signature style. An animated version of the singer played Bart Simpson’s tree-house casino in 1993. Robert Goulet died on Tuesday of pulmonary fibrosis at age 73. He’ll always be cool.

—Posted by David Gianatasio

Published on October 31, 2007 | Permalink | Comments (6)

Cadbury’s drum-crazed gorilla is unmasked

England’s Daily Mail this weekend published a story with more than you’d ever want to know about Cadbury’s drumming gorilla—in particular, the intricacies of the Stan Winston-made suit itself. The actor inside, Garon Michael, sounds conflicted about his role. “I’ve always loved the song, and when I was drumming to it for the commercial, I was wearing earphones and had the song blasted into my ears. So I really felt that rapture listening to it,” he says. Still, he adds wistfully, “When I got into acting, let’s just say this wasn’t the path I had planned out.” (He may be referring to this.) But the ad, which you can watch here, is a big success. Phil Collins’ 1981 song “In the Air Tonight” is back in the top 20 on the charts, and Cadbury has reportedly seen a 9 percent rise in sales of Dairy Milk chocolate bars in the U.K.

—Posted by Tim Nudd

Published on October 31, 2007 | Permalink | Comments (0)
Filed under Cadbury

Amuse friends, annoy critics this Halloween

If you’re looking for that perfect last-minute costume idea, here are some elaborate instructions on how to dress like a Geico caveman for Halloween. It does produce one hell of a likeness, I must admit. Hopefully this guy won’t listen to his fans, though, one of whom suggests he “should do the same thing with like Tom Cruise or something and make people freak out!” No, he shouldn’t. It would be a waste of time, and anyone over six feet tall would have to hack their legs off at the knee to capture the appearance of that little goblin. If people really want horrible costumes that badly, they can save themselves a lot of time and just buy the ones on this list.

—Posted by David Kiefaber

Published on October 31, 2007 | Permalink | Comments (0)
Filed under Kiefaber

The fake-music-video genre gets perfected

“We can prank call John Edwards and tell him he’s gay.” That’s just one salient line from “Perfected: The Ann Coulter Song” (above), the latest YouTube music video from barelypolitical, the brains behind the recent Obama Girl craze. Coulter, of course, topped her attacks on Edwards with an appearance on Donny Deutsch’s CNBC show The Big Idea in which she talked about the need for Jews to be “perfected.” The new music clip has 300,000-plus views so far, but it’s bound to be outstripped by “The Colbert Song.” True, there’s no such song yet, but surely barelypolitical (or the Colbert campaign itself) is working on one. Maybe they can just reuse “Perfected,” splicing in Colbert’s name and likeness as needed, or superimposing glasses on Ann’s face. The Apples in Stereo’s “Stephen Stephen” would serve in a pinch.

—Posted by David Gianatasio

Published on October 31, 2007 | Permalink | Comments (1)

Ruin a friend’s day with a ‘Nip/Tuck’ call

Have a friend who feels bad about his or her body? Exploit that weakness to comic and/or devasting effect with the latest “Send a personalized message” phone gimmick, this one courtesy of the FX series Nip/Tuck. You pick the part of your friend’s body that needs some work (breasts, butt, calves, ears), and doctors Sean McNamara and Christian Troy will handle the rest in a quick, traumatic phone call. The terms and conditions ask you to “please use your best judgment and be respectful of other individuals.” Wink wink, nudge nudge. The show returns for its fifth season tonight.

—Posted by Tim Nudd

Published on October 30, 2007 | Permalink | Comments (2)

Meat falls off the bone at Mr. Spriggs BBQ

Here in New York, we’ve got humorous barbecue-joint advertising covered with this Daisy May’s BBQ spot. But Oklahoma City may have us beat with the above spot for Mr. Spriggs, where meat does indeed fall right off the bone. Neither restaurant uses the obvious tagline, “Don’t need no teef to eat our beef.”

—Posted by Tim Nudd

Published on October 30, 2007 | Permalink | Comments (2)

Adulthood can wait for just one more year

If the Census Bureau issued an annual Index of Permanent Adolescence, one key component would be the percentage of adults who dress up for Halloween. That is, after all, one of the more conspicuous indications of people’s refusal to become full-fledged adults even as they move through their 20s and beyond. A poll by Rasmussen Reports finds “only” 18 percent of adults planning to be in costume on Wednesday, down a shade from last year’s 20 percent. A Gallup survey, meanwhile, finds 27 percent of adult-only households planning to spend money on costumes this year. And in a BIGresearch poll fielded last month for the National Retail Federation, 34 percent of adults said they intended to dress up. Among these merry-makers, the most popular costume choices were witch, pirate, vampire, cat and princess. The once-popular “French maid” look has dropped into a tie for 18th place. Too grown-up, presumably.

—Posted by Mark Dolliver

Published on October 30, 2007 | Permalink | Comments (5)

MySpace’s Tom Anderson is an old fogey

Shocked. I am shocked and appalled. There are some things in life you can’t help but trust, like the accuracy of MySpace profiles. Now comes word that a man on MySpace lied—lied!—about his age, subtracting five years. How would he even think of that? Next you’ll tell me all those scantily clad women who want to be my friends on MySpace didn’t just move to this area. It turns out this lying MySpace guy is everybody’s friend, site founder Tom Anderson. He said he was 27 when the site started; he was actually 32. He’ll be 37 next week, although his profile says 32. Newsweek flooded the zone to confirm this hot scoop from TechCrunch. How could Tom do this? Is there no honor left?

—Posted by Brian Morrissey

Published on October 30, 2007 | Permalink | Comments (3)
Filed under Morrissey

Digital agencies: to blog or not to blog?

David Armano, a vp of experience design at Critical Mass and a prolific blogger at Logic+Emotion, asks why some digital agencies aren’t blogging. In a poll that’s running on his site, 67 percent of 165 respondents said definitely. Critical Mass, Organic and Avenue A/Razorfish all have blogs. Notable names that are missing in the blogosphere: Agency.com, AKQA, Blast Radius, R/GA, Tribal DDB and WhittmanHart. At a time when nearly every client is looking to figure out social media, it does seem curious that these shops wouldn’t buff up their credentials by trying out a blog. Then again, as DDB’s blogs demonstrate (Bob Scarpelli has posted exactly twice since his creativity blog launched on Sept. 4), it takes some commitment to keep a blog running. UPDATE: Digitas’s account planning group has a blog, too.

—Posted by Brian Morrissey

Published on October 30, 2007 | Permalink | Comments (5)
Filed under Morrissey

Putting Sergey Brin under the Googlescope

The FTC is discussing online privacy issues this week. Data mining, cyber profiling and ad targeting are serious stuff, with far-reaching implications for our personal freedoms. Who do we have to thank for this potential savaging of our individual rights? Sergey Brin, co-founder of Google. How did I find him? I Googled, that’s how. Before the Google-DoubleClick deal becomes final, and the entire universe learns every detail of my life, including my predilection for Herb Alpert CDs and Dockers (often both on the same night), I’ve decided to give Sergey some food for thought by disclosing some of his personal tidbits gleaned via Google. I’m hoping Brin will cave in to my demands and replace all Google-able information about me with biographical data pertaining to Kid Rock.
  Fact 1: Sergey’s birthday is Aug. 21. (Mine is Nov. 25. But you knew that, Sergey, didn’t you?)
  Fact 2: Sergey’s middle name is Mikhailovich. (Mine is John. I’m sharing because Web 2.0 is all about having a two-way conversation.)
  Fact 3: Sergey was born in Moscow. (I was born in Bridgeport, Conn. Both have gulags and sub-par seasonal snow removal.)
  Fact 4: Brin’s net worth is estimated at $18.5 billion, and at age 34, he ranks as the world’s fourth-youngest billionaire. (Mine is ... well, I’ll stop there, because it’s tough to type with tears spilling onto the keyboard.)
  If you want to learn more about Sergey, Google him for yourself. To find out more about me, click here.

—Posted by David Gianatasio

Published on October 30, 2007 | Permalink | Comments (3)

Dangerous toys ain’t what they used to be

I just got an e-mail inviting me to a conference call about the “trade of deadly consumer products”—in particular, tainted Halloween toys. Yes, ’tis the season for missives about unsafe toys to hit my inbox like so many lumps of coal in a non-denominational stocking. Still, all danger is relative, as this old list of very bad toys proves. When I was about 8 years old (William Henry Harrison was president), I learned a valuable lesson about unsafe toys. Some older kids were playing solider in the woods near my house, using simple tree branches for guns. Attempting to join in the pre-adolescent mayhem, I discovered just how painful a slab of oak can be when properly applied. Where was the tree lobby to save my backside then? Where was Al Gore? My point: If it’s made by Mattel, consider it deadly. Better yet, just toss anything that says “Made in China.” And good luck to the U.S. Olympians in Beijing next year. With any luck, your action figures will be made in Romania.

—Posted by David Gianatasio

Published on October 29, 2007 | Permalink | Comments (0)

Jordan’s Furniture screwed by Red Sox win

To whom it may concern:
  So, the Red Sox won the World Series. That means we at Jordan’s Furniture now have to make good on that offer of free sofas, chairs and beds for customers who ordered them between March 7 and April 16 of this year. We took 30,000 orders. The stunt was a huge success, got us lots of headlines and boosted our visibility. Our marketing department deserves all the credit. They’re a superbly talent bunch of out-of-the-box thinkers. Yeah, this was a real home run. Now, we’ve gotta pay up. And pay and pay and pay.
  In related news, our entire marketing department is now available for hire. Please accept this note as our unequivocal recommendation for their employment at your company. We’re sure they’ll be a smashing success ... somewhere else. Genuine all-stars, etc.
  Good luck. You’re going to need it.
  Sincerely,
  Jordan’s Furniture
P.S.: “Rare feat,” “Highly unlikely,” “Don’t worry, boss, it’ll never happen,” my ass!

—Posted by David Gianatasio

Published on October 29, 2007 | Permalink | Comments (9)

Emirates films world’s longest commercial?

You’ve seen the world’s biggest billboard. Could this be the world’s longest commercial? Emirates airlines just launched nonstop service from Dubai to São Paulo, a flight that takes 14 hours and 40 minutes. To promote the route, they filmed a Brazilian guy named Fernando Ferreira talking about his home country, nonstop, for 14 hours and 40 minutes straight. “No breaks, no cuts, no edits, no cheating,” Ferreira insists. That’s the trailer posted above. You’re welcome to subject yourself to the whole thing at NonstopFernando.com. It’s just like a 30-second spot, only 1,760 times as long. Even fast-forwarding through it will take you several hours.

—Posted by Tim Nudd

Published on October 29, 2007 | Permalink | Comments (1)

Put your superhuman bionic self to the test

I am the least bionic man ever to walk this earth. At least, that’s what this Web site for NBC’s Bionic Woman told me. They ran tests, and I trust NBC not to mislead me on this. The site is quite fun, and the five “tests,” which consist of video/audio processing puzzles, are pretty challenging. It’s almost like they put some effort into making a real Web site instead of an artless sales pitch with Flash objects in it. No one should be surprised, though. I mean, they do have the technology. Via Adverblog.

—Posted by David Kiefaber

Published on October 29, 2007 | Permalink | Comments (1)
Filed under Kiefaber

Making iPod commercials ain’t that hard

The phrase “teen fanboy” fills me with dread, so I was already on the defensive when I began reading Gizmodo’s item about Apple running an ad by ... a teen fanboy for the iPod Touch. And lo and behold, the ad is a glorified YouTube video backed by the world’s most annoying song. It’s not even demonstrably unlike something you’d see from a trendy ad agency these days. But it could have been worse. The teen fangirl contribution would have shown the Mac and PC guys making out for 10 minutes.

—Posted by David Kiefaber

Published on October 29, 2007 | Permalink | Comments (3)
Filed under Kiefaber

T-Radio gets chased out of Boston subway

And ... we’re back. You’re listening to T-Radio, but not for long. Hold on to your straps, ’cuz we’re leaving the station for the last time. It’s sad but true: T-Radio has reached the end of the line in Boston. It’s been a great two weeks ... except when you nerds complained and got us canceled. You’re so uncool, you must work at Digitas. Our ad revenue would’ve funded all kinds of badly needed improvements. And if anything was left over after we aluminum-sided our vacation houses in Vermont, we were going to buy garbage cans for the platform at Alewife. Ah well, that will always be the dream. Signing off now, but here’s the Fab Four with a final request going out to Charlie. Remember: Keep your feet on the ground, keep reaching for the stars ... and move all the way in, people, plenty of room inside the car!

—Posted by David Gianatasio

Published on October 29, 2007 | Permalink | Comments (1)

Movie studios cranking out R-rated trailers

Movie blog Cinematical today points out an interesting Los Angeles Times article about the proliferation of “red-band trailers.” These uncensored film previews are popping up more and more, often on restricted sites run by the studios themselves. (You know you’re doing your marketing right if YouTube won’t even allow it.) The article points out that a red-band trailer gives you a realistic taste of the vulgarity, violence or nudity you can expect to see in the film. The Coen brothers’ new bloodbath, No Country for Old Men, is a good example. But theater owners aren’t too interested in running the unsanitized spots. Their theory is that someone might be OK with seeing an R-rated movie packed with nudity, but that doesn’t mean they’ll want to see a preview where someone gets decapitated. Somewhere in this debate arose the “yellow-band trailer,” a worthless MPAA hybrid that’s “approved only for age-appropriate Internet users.” Whatever that means. I watched the yellow-band preview of Halloween and didn’t really see a difference. And call me cynical, but it seems like some of these red-bands are really just about getting salacious buzz. Otherwise, I don’t exactly see why there’s an R-rated trailer for the PG-13 Beowulf.

—Posted by David Griner

Published on October 26, 2007 | Permalink | Comments (0)
Filed under Griner

Teen Mommy Darci: the world’s best doll?

Adverganza today posted a link to a not-very-subtle, Oozinator-esque safe-sex PSA from England, featuring an action figure named G.I. Jonny, who saves a girl from a very sloppy encounter with a guy. The spot reminded me of a couple of great old pregnancy-awareness PSAs from a small Boise, Idaho, agency called es/drake. The one above is a spoof doll spot featuring Teen Mommy Darci; the other, aimed at boys, stars the macho Action Teen Father. Both spots have lot of great details, and the parody is spot-on. “New diaper action grip saves the day!”

—Posted by Tim Nudd

Published on October 26, 2007 | Permalink | Comments (3)

AdFreak on Twitter: less talkin, more linkin

Here at AdFreak, we pride ourselves on giving a little dose of analysis, criticism or incoherent rambling with each item we post. But sometimes a headline and a link can say it all. So we’ve launched the AdFreak Twitter feed, a mini-blog of sorts featuring quick morsels from our Net wanderings. At the top right of the homepage, you’ll see our newest Twitter posts. Just click a headline to go straight to the action. At the bottom of our Twitter sidebar is a permanent link to Twitter.com/AdFreak, where you can get set up to follow our posts in blistering real time. Best of all, we promise not to write about what we had for breakfast, how tired we are, or where we found ivory satin ballet flats.

—Posted by David Griner

Published on October 26, 2007 | Permalink | Comments (1)
Filed under Griner

‘Girls Gone Wild’ founder pleads case in ads

Joe Francis, the currently incarcerated brainbox behind the Girls Gone Wild franchise, has likened his treatment to that of a terrorist in a series of UNCENSORED online ads he’s paid for to try to win public sympathy. His statement was released from a lightless vault somewhere in the Badlands; Francis croaked out the words to reporters as masked federal agents beat him with chain whips and electrocuted him through live jumper cables attached to his testicles. Oh wait, that’s not what happened. Francis is in regular jail, and only because he couldn’t keep his temper in check during court mediation and was held for contempt. Which, incidentally, is all anyone should feel for him.

—Posted by David Kiefaber

Published on October 26, 2007 | Permalink | Comments (5)
Filed under Kiefaber

Blogs are big business? Do tell me more.

Blog World sent me some story ideas ahead of its inaugural Blog World & New Media Expo in Las Vegas next month. Here are my thoughts on some of their suggestions.
  “Blogging becoming mainstream—research from Parks Associates shows a significant percentage of U.S. households visit social networking sites and/or read blogs regularly!” • Key questions: Should I cancel my cable? Why can’t my Epson QX-10 computer get Facebook?
  “Former journalists are now making lucrative careers blogging—many make six-figure salaries or more.” • With six figures, I could finally replace that QX-10, as long as decimal points don’t count. Maybe I could even move out of my parents’ basement. Does Steve Hall make six figures? Note to self: Quit on Monday, or at least find a new place for lunch.
  “Standards are being set, codes of ethics refined. What procedures and policies are in place or being solidified for self-employed bloggers?” • If I employ myself, who sends the checks? Related: Remember to send Mom a birthday card.
  “Monetizing blogs through advertising revenue—a win/win opportunity for bloggers AND advertisers.” • You can advertise on blogs?! Must e-mail Huffington and Zuckerberg and ask.
  “How is the ‘blogosphere’ impacting the viability of traditional print media—has the insurgence of blogs caused/is about to cause the demise of key business and news pubs over the past few years (e.g., Industry Standard, Red Herring, Business 2.0?)” • That would explain why I haven’t gotten my Industry Standard, Red Herring and Business 2.0 in a while.
  Food for thought, indeed. I can’t make it to Vegas, but I’ll follow the event as best I can on my QX-10. As long as they’re webcasting it on CompuServe.

—Posted by David Gianatasio

Published on October 26, 2007 | Permalink | Comments (0)

Clutter problem? Live large over in Dubai.

Say you were to sell a client on the idea of a five-acre ad. Where could you run such a monstrosity? Why, in Dubai, of course. Dubai is not exactly where you go for subtlety. The home to the world’s tallest hotel, and another 27-story one completely underwater, is now where you can find the world’s largest outdoor ad: a 200-by-100-meter creation TBWA\RAAD Abu Dhabi did on behalf of Sorouh, an Abu Dhabi real-estate developer. Should you find yourself winging into Dubai for a pitch, keep an eye out: TBWA says the poster is visible on the flight path to the airport. Ominously, the ad promises it’s the “face of the future,” and there are plans to extend the jumbo ads to “sites around the world.”

—Posted by Brian Morrissey

Published on October 25, 2007 | Permalink | Comments (6)
Filed under Morrissey

Boston/Denver bet has brand-name flavor

The Red Sox are in the World Series, and they won the first game? No wonder I was grabbed by a gang of drunken revelers here in Boston last night and stuffed inside a garbage can. Bad day to wear my Yankees cap, I guess. The mayors of Boston and Denver (home to the rival Colorado Rockies) have made the traditional “good-natured bet” for the Series. Samples of Denver brands like Quiznos subs, Celestial Seasonings teas and Epic Valley salsas will head to Boston if the Sox win, while Legal seafood, Dunkin’ Donuts coffee and Brigham’s ice cream will be shipped to Denver if the Rockies prevail. Of course, it’s all in the name of charity (the goods get donated) and branding, the latter firmly entrenched as America’s true national pastime these days. I don’t care which team wins, as long as that Sox-obsessed D’Angelo’s Steak and Cheese mascot is sent packing. I’m pretty sure he was one of the locals who was banging the can with a bat as I rolled down Beacon Hill.

—Posted by David Gianatasio

Published on October 25, 2007 | Permalink | Comments (6)