VeriSign putting the cart before the horse

McCann Erickson goes hard for the humor in its latest VeriSign campaign. There's a "Cart Whisperer" named "Liberty Fillmore" who rounds up abandoned shopping carts. The teaser clip above is more amusing than I’d expected, but the shopping-cart metaphor (companies that lose consumer trust also lose customers) was a stretch. Still, VeriSign isn’t Apple, so you’ve got to give the e-commerce infrastructure company points for trying to do something a little different. The YouTube video got 833,000+ views in five days? And almost every comment says “LOL”? The agency’s employees, and their families and friends, must be aching with carpel tunnel. The No More Abandoned Carts site takes the joke a bit too far with copy like “Save a cart, win a thing.” I actually lost IQ points typing that line, and I didn’t have all that many to start with. Hey, ever race shopping carts down store aisles or crash them into BMWs outside a Whole Foods? I’m just curious.

—Posted by David Gianatasio

Published on February 29, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (9)
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Marketers try to make of meal of Leap Day

Today, Feb. 29, is Leap Day, the day added every four years to keep the calendar from falling out of step with the astronomical year and destroying civilization as we know it. The New York Times reported earlier this week on some efforts from marketers to take advantage. Mostly, this seems to involve offers of free food from restaurants like Boston Market, Morton’s The Steakhouse and Papa John’s, who apparently see Feb. 29 as just another opportunity for you to gorge yourself. (Most of the offers only apply to “leaplings,” who are those actually born on Feb. 29.) Dove’s Campaign for Real Beauty is trying something a bit more admirable by holding self-esteem workshops around the world. (“Our mission is to make more women feel beautiful every day,” says a rep.) Virgin America has been holding a “Why leap when you can fly” sale. And the tourism people in Atlantic City, N.J., have come up with 29 ways to enjoy the boardwalk and beyond. The most famous leaplings of all, Norway’s Henriksen siblings (shown here), born on consecutive Leap Days in 1960, 1964 and 1968, are keeping a low profile, out of all ad materials (though Mental Floss magazine is having a 20-percent-off sale in their honor). And the one marketer perhaps entitled to toot its horn today, Intel, whose tagline is “Leap ahead,” doesn’t appear to be doing anything special. Which may be for the best.

—Posted by Tim Nudd

Published on February 29, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (1)
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Try out Mother London's 'uncarriable' bags

Suddenly feeling the urge to give people bags to carry around, Mother in London, in its typical jokey way, instead came up with a line of “uncarriable” bags that you’d theoretically be embarrased to tote around with you. And they are fun indeed. See the whole collection over at Neatorama. Who wouldn’t love a Texas Gay Republicans bag (well, besides John Manlove)? That Phil Collins fan-club bag is pretty good, too. Even classic jokes like the sperm donation center and a fried dolphin stand get some play here. It’s only a matter of time before they make a bag for Federal Breast Inspectors.

—Posted by David Kiefaber

Published on February 29, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (5)
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Tapeworms and other inadvisable diet plans

This list of crank diets illustrates, if nothing else, how willing Americans are to try any weight-loss methods except the correct ones. While most of these are innocuous, calorie-cutting schemes, there are a few ideas, like the tapeworm diet (parasite yourself thin!) and the Russian peasant diet (bet those starving proles never have to squeeze into their summer pants), that sound utterly unworkable, as well as insane. (And did the tapeworms really come “jar packed,” like it says in the old ad shown here?) The real kicker is the diet where you’re injected with urine from pregnant women, which is apparently some kind of fat-blasting nectar from Olympus. It clearly doesn’t work, because nerds have been consuming pee under a different name for years now, and most of them are still fat.

—Posted by David Kiefaber

Published on February 29, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (0)
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Campbell-Ewald is hugging a bunch of trees

Tired, perhaps, of choking on the noxious smog that hangs over Detroit (look, it ain't Vermont!), Campbell-Ewald is launching a green-marketing practice called Garden. From the release: “Garden will help marketers reflect their environmental initiatives in messages that connect consumers’ needs with client products that contribute to a greener planet.” Awesome! There’s something called the “Garden Grow Process,” and “social audits” are referenced. Also, staffers will apparently be fired for drinking bottled water. Though I could be wrong about that, because I wasn’t really paying attention. Here’s a trippy clip from The Magic Garden. I used to watch it when I was in pre-school. C-E’s announcement made me think of the program: Every day in the garden was happy and peaceful and filled with song. Will they merrily sing “How Dry I Am” at C-E when the new eco-friendly water dispensers break down? (OK, I still watch The Magic Garden. There, I zinged myself. Happy now, C-E?)

—Posted by David Gianatasio

Published on February 29, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (0)
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AT&T ad 'improved' to reflect ties to NSA

The Billboard Liberation Front has hijacked this AT&T billboard in the San Francisco area, following the recent revelations that AT&T has been handing over consumer voice and data information to the National Security Agency. BLF’s humorous press release contains a mock quote from an NSA rep, who says: “[REDACTED] we [REDACTED] condone [REDACTED] warrantless [REDACTED], [REDACTED] SIGINT intercepts, [REDACTED] torture [REDACTED] information retrieval by [REDACTED] means necessary.” Via Boing Boing.

—Posted by Tim Nudd

Published on February 28, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (5)
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'Untraceable' ad now a twisted dead thing

Considering the plot of the movie Untraceable (serial killer broadcasts his murders online, and kills people faster as more people visit the site), we could have expected a pretty violent marketing campaign to match. But Universal Pictures in the U.K. apparently outdid itself with a Facebook page that showed a grisly video of someone being tortured, and some lovely accompanying prose which read, “This guy is going to die. You want to see his stinking flesh burn and bleed and blacken? Until he’s some twisted dead thing? This is what you want. And I’ve filmed it especially for you. The more fans I get, the more I’ll show.” The page has been pulled, but Universal seems pleased with the effort anyway. Says Neil Wirashina, the studio’s director of international advertising media: “We were looking to promote a reaction, and we have definitely achieved this.”

—Posted by Tim Nudd

Published on February 28, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (6)
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Body parts argue over bottles of Coke Zero

Wieden + Kennedy Amsterdam cranks up the absurd-o-meter with a batch of amusing new Coke Zero spots (here, here, here and here), in which an eye, a pair of tongues, a finger and a brain bicker about their respective sensory experiences of soda. The eye, who’s French, looks down on the loutish British tongues, who, because they’re blind, think they’re drinking regular Coke rather than Coke Zero. The Jabba-like brain crawls in and scolds both sides for giving him a headache. And the finger, who’s a stoner, first complains that the bottle label isn’t written in Braille, then resorts to a “Pull my finger” joke, which is turning out to be popular in advertising this year. Via Advertolog.

—Posted by Tim Nudd

Published on February 28, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (6)
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Someone get Bill Gates some connections

You've got to feel sorry for Bill Gates over on LinkedIn. As of this writing Thursday morning, he has just three connections, despite being head over heels about the site. I’m guessing he rejected numerous link requests from Steve Jobs (all pranks comparing the iPod to the Zune) and Yahoo!’s Jerry Yang, who probably wanted to know why Gates never returns his calls (not to mention all the pleas for refunds on Vista!). I’m also somewhat suspicious of the résumé Gates posted. He’s held essentially the same job at Microsoft for 33 years! As a hiring manager, I’d be thinking: Why is this guy stuck in a rut? Does he rub co-workers, or perhaps government regulatory agencies, the wrong way? Actually, he also lists the Bill & Medlinda Gates Foundation, but that’s clearly padding and it just screams “self-employed!” Once he announces Microsoft’s LinkedIn investment or acquisition or whatever the hell he’s up to, I’m sure his popularity will soar. Oh, he lists reading, tennis and bridge as his personal interests. If he’s got an extra $100 million lying around, I’ve got a nice little suspension number in Brooklyn I’m looking to unload.

—Posted by David Gianatasio

Published on February 28, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (0)
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Congress could benefit from some Manlove

There's no way this John Manlove for Congress Web site is on the level. No one with that name runs for Congress in Texas, as a Republican, do they? A “Congress needs Manlove” bumper sticker might not help his image. Or “Vote Republican, vote Manlove”? Even associating the word with one’s bumper introduces problems. Manlove is an ad executive, what’s more—his agency won a slew of Houston Addy awards last year. Hey, maybe he and his name are legit. If so, he should build an international coalition and bring in this guy as a spokesperson.

—Posted by David Kiefaber

Published on February 28, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (1)
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Grown men in diapers a watertight concept

The actors in this TV commercial for Canada's Scream TV must have really needed the cash. The spot, from Zig in Toronto, calls for them to prance around in diapers with big grins on their faces, secure in the knowledge that the giant white bags strapped around their loins won’t leak a drop, whatever unforeseen accidents occur (caused by frightening moments in Scream’s scary movies, for example). Bladder-control humor, of course, has a long and sordid history. The best-known commercial spoof is probably this one, selling “adult diapers for lazy people.”

—Posted by Tim Nudd

Published on February 27, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (1)
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William F. Buckley had a way with words

William F. Buckley Jr., the acid-tongued, staunchly conservative author (40+ books), columnist (since 1979), publishing exec (National Review) and TV host (Firing Line), helped shape the modern media landscape. His reaction to a society increasingly obsessed by celebrity and trivia was rigorously intellectual, intense and probing. Buckley never stopped at the surface, equivocated about his positions, or suffered fools gladly (“I won’t insult your intelligence by suggesting that you really believe what you just said,” he once quipped when presented with a viewpoint in opposition to his own). Buckley was no friend to the left (“Liberals claim to want to give a hearing to other views, but then are shocked and offended to discover that there are other views”), but he also knew when to stick it to The Man (“It had all the earmarks of a CIA operation; the bomb killed everybody in the room except the intended target!”). He was feared, beloved, ridiculed, admired and despised. Though it all, he had an unfailingly playful sense of humor about himself (“Some of my instincts are reprehensible”) and the best diction of any English speaker on the planet. William F. Buckley Jr. died today at his home in Connecticut at age 82. This seems a fitting end-quote: “I get satisfaction of three kinds. One is creating something, one is being paid for it, and one is the feeling that I haven’t just been sitting on my ass all afternoon.”

—Posted by David Gianatasio

Published on February 27, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (0)
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D.C. Metro rats out New York City subway

Washington, D.C., is celebrating one of its only advantages over New York: fewer rats in the subway system. This ad, running in the D.C. Metro, begins, “Unlike some subway systems (which will remain nameless), you don’t see rats the size of house cats roaming Metro.” This ticked off New York Times writer Jennifer 8. Lee, who says it’s “a little out of form for [one] city to needle another about our rats.” She also doesn’t think the reference to house cats is fair, “unless they are very small house cats.” A Metro spokesman says it’s not meant as an insult to New York at all, saying, “It can [refer to] any other transit system. It doesn’t make reference to any other transit property at all.” Technically, this is true. New York’s war on rats has been well documented, of course, though its primary focus remains the vermin above ground—particularly those who patronize KFC and Taco Bell.

—Posted by Tim Nudd

Published on February 27, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (1)
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Mayor stripped of office over MySpace pics

Carmen Kontur-Gronquist, the mayor of Arlington, Ore., has been removed from office following a 142-139 recall vote after a risqué pic on her personal (and non-public) MySpace page peeved some townsfolk. A fire truck and black lingerie were involved. The image is about as racy as your average Sears catalog ad. But imagine those poor city councilors trying to focus on the hottest issues—I mean, the hot-button issues—in the Pacific Northwest these days. Such as the bare problem—I mean, bear problem. “That’s my personal life. It has nothing to do with my mayor’s position,” says Kontur-Gronquist. In Boston, we have an always fully clothed mayor, Tom Menino, who to the best of my knowledge has never posed in racy underwear on a fire truck. (And let’s keep it that way—OK, Mr. Mayor?)

—Posted by David Gianatasio

Published on February 27, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (7)
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How may Martin Scorsese direct your call?

This one's been out for a little while, but it's worth a laugh: Martin Scorsese's “Turn off your cell phone” cinema ad from BBDO. American Express has also featured the director spoofing himself, as has HBO’s Curb Your Enthusiasm, but it doesn’t really get old.

—Posted by Tim Nudd

Published on February 27, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (2)
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How did I survive the Starbucks shutdown?

Yawwwwwwwnnn. Starbucks closed up shop for a few hours last night to "re-educate" its employees. I didn't take it so well. Could’ve used a grande with extra foam around 6 p.m. Went to Dunkin’ and forgot to order a latte to get their 99-cent anti-Starbucks price. Odd how the mind wanders. The large with three sugars gave me enough pep to begin research on this post. I walked past the nearest Starbucks and peered inside. A half-dozen baristas were nibbling scones. Maybe they were playing one of the mix CDs they sell. Sounded like Al Green. My attention was dragging, so I didn’t bother sticking around. Napped at my desk. Began writing this item, but was too tired for complete sentences or coherent analysis. Thursday and Friday, McDonald’s is giving away a McSkillet Burrito with each drink purchase. The last time I had a McSkillet, I hallucinated I was Ralph Nader and stood in rush-hour traffic begging commuters to vote for me and drive safely. Or maybe I acted that way after downing three grandes in less than an hour. So hard to focus. Can’t keep my eyes open. Think I’ll turn in early.

—Posted by David Gianatasio

Published on February 27, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (1)
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Morgan Spurlock's latest deep-fried exploits

The last time we saw Morgan Spurlock in theaters, he was shocking the world by showing people how eating three grease-fried meals a day is bad for you. Now, his gimmicky iconoclasm takes a turn for the geopolitical with his upcoming movie, Where in the World Is Osama Bin Laden? Here’s the trailer, in which Spurlock putzes around the Middle East, befuddled as to why no Arabs are taking a white guy ironically dressed like them seriously. They might also be wondering where Rockapella is.

—Posted by David Kiefaber

Published on February 27, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (0)
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Classical music enjoys brush with relevance

When the New York Philharmonic played a concert in Pyongyang this week, the ample media coverage talked about how an isolated corner of humanity was being brought into contact with the wider world. Oddly enough, these stories seemed to be talking about the North Koreans rather than about the classical musicians. While a few elite orchestras routinely play to full houses, this doesn’t alter the fact that classical music seems increasingly isolated from modern life for most people. When’s the last time anything an orchestra did was front-page news? Nowadays, a classical concert is lucky to get a few inches of space in the arts section, amid the coverage of pop-culture celebs. By the way, the article about the concert in the online version of the Washington Post was accompanied by an ad for the U.S. Air Force—i.e., the folks who’ll be bombing North Korea’s nuclear-weapon facilities one of these days if diplomatic efforts don’t pan out. A nice touch, eh?

—Posted by Mark Dolliver

Published on February 26, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (1)
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Jarring N.Z. ads give drivers a wake-up call

With all the subtlety of a splattered skull, New Zealand highway-safety officials have launched a disturbing ad campaign with the tagline, “Sleep before you drive.” You can see (literal) executions here, here and here on Ads of the World. It’s an interesting campaign topic because it truly can affect anyone at any time. There’s no “Just say no” approach to getting sleepy like there is with drunken driving, and maybe graphic reminders like these will help people realize that they can be too tired for the road. For New Zealand, which is no stranger to gruesome road-safety ads, it’s certainly an issue of concern—the government estimates there were 134 fatal fatigue-related accidents from 2002 to 2004. Maybe the U.S. needs a similar campaign. According to this video about Volvo’s new fatigue-alert system, there are about 100,000 sleepy-driver accidents a year in America, with 1,500 people killed and 70,000 injured. Maybe the U.S. version can show a king-size, four-poster Hummer bed crushing my twin-size VW into a utility pole.

—Posted by David Griner

Published on February 26, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (1)
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Choose your own nasty adventures on HBO

Oscar-winning director Sam Mendes and BBDO have whipped up a few promos for HBO that show the same vignettes twice, but with different endings. The more subversive endings are meant to illustrate the kinds of stories you’ll find on HBO. (“There are stories. ... And there are stories you talk about.”) One of the spots (above) features mile-high love, but compared with our favorite ad from that genre, this one feels a bit run-of-the-mill. A second spot in the series is more mean-spirited and enjoyable. Via Advertolog.

—Posted by Tim Nudd

Published on February 26, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (0)
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TDA throws the book at Holocaust denials

The frightening thing about TDA's ad for Hillel Colorado's Holocaust Awareness Week is the degree to which its premise is not a fiction. Millions of people do refuse to believe that the Holocaust took place. How many school kids today view The Diary of Anne Frank as a work of imagination, rather than a Jewish girl’s tragic true account of hiding from the Nazis with her family during World War II? Maybe one day, books telling of the American Revolution, the U.S. Civil War, the conflict in Korea, the Cold War, Vietnam, scores of mass exterminations throughout history and even human triumphs like the lunar landings and the fact that the Earth circles the sun will be viewed as fictions. Denying a single truth is the first step toward denying them all.

—Posted by David Gianatasio

Published on February 26, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (2)
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To live and die with '80s-era movie trailers

Since William L. Petersen's birthday wasn't too long ago, here's a 1985 teaser/trailer for To Live and Die in L.A., a movie that reminded a lot of people of what Miami Vice would have been if it was good. Also notable are Willem Dafoe as the smooth counterfeiter, back before his face looked like something off a totem pole, and the Wang Chung soundtrack that tethers this movie to its decade of origin. Thankfully, the trailer itself is too epileptic to expose how dated the movie is. Still, enjoy it, and maybe next year they’ll give us that car chase in reverse.

—Posted by David Kiefaber

Published on February 26, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (1)
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So long, Robert Jarvik, we hardly knew ye

Poor Mr. Robert Jarvik. I can't call him Dr. Robert Jarvik, because he's not actually licensed to practice medicine. Pfizer just pulled a Lipitor spot in which he wore a white lab coat and later appeared to row a small boat. Jarvik actually used a “stunt double” for the rowing scene. I can only hope he found the coat-wearing scene somewhat less taxing. I wish I could use a “stunt blogger” here on AdFreak, for days when I just don’t feel like writing, you know? Anyway, my advice to the folks at Pfizer is to take a few aspirin and chill until the whole thing blows over. I’m also not licensed to practice medicine, and therefore just as qualified as Robert Jarvik to dispense medical advice. (I could also row my own boat, but I don’t feel like it today.)

—Posted by David Gianatasio

Published on February 26, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (2)
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The dead are rising to the occasion (of PR)

If you’re a fan of zombie movies, chances are good that you admire the daddy of the walking dead, George A. Romero. Chances are also good that you’d love Urban Dead, a massive free Internet game inspired by classic zombie cinema like Romero’s Dawn of the Dead. Now the 3-year-old game has gotten the official Romero stamp of approval for a tie-in with his upcoming release, Diary of the Dead. The already sprawling Urban Dead has added a huge new playing area modeled after the town of Monroeville from Romero’s movie. Players in the text-based game can loot video cameras, shoot footage of the outbreak and then edit together a video diary for a chance to win Romero box sets. Kevan Davis, the game designer behind Urban Dead, tells AdFreak he was approached by U.K. ad agency Beatwax about a possible tie-in: “I pitched some potential ideas, they arranged a preview screening of the film so that I could draw details from it, and they've paid for both the development time and the advertising space.” If you’re looking to film some virtual brain-munching — or bite off some gray matter yourself — now’s your chance.

—Posted by David Griner

Published on February 25, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (0)
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Obama Girl's sexiness is befouled by sweat

You know, it's great that Amber Lee "Obama Girl" Ettinger is making a living, but maybe she should go ahead and set some standards for her new gigs. Like maybe pass on a low-budget spot that calls for her to show off armpit stains and say the line, “I had the problem of excess perspiration.” Well apparently CertainDri works too well, because she apparently has to outsource her sweating. Via Make the Logo Bigger.

—Posted by David Griner

Published on February 25, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (0)
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