Quiznos ads becoming just one big gay joke

Quiznos kills two birds with one stone—gay people and poor people—in this new ad from Siltanen & Partners, showing a pair of Southern gents sharing a "hillbilly hot tub" (which is apparently just a regular tub propped up and heated by a wood fire). The Quiznos oven, which has some experience in homoerotic relations (the "Put it in me, Scott" commercial), narrates: "Hooo, that hillbilly hot tub looks dangerous. And hot. But not as hot as Quiznos's new double-cheese cheesesteak!" Quiznos's young male target apparently loves this kind of stuff, however bizarre the product comparison. Almost anyone else will find the spot unappetizing—including The Denver Egotist, which somewhat humorously is bothered mostly by the fact that the Colorado-based account continues to be handled outside Colorado.

—Posted by Tim Nudd

Previously on AdFreak:
Quiznos oven craving some foot-long lovin'
Quiznos oven now driving guys into therapy

Published on October 19, 2009 | Permalink | Comments (3)
Filed under Food and drink, Nudd, Quiznos, Restaurants, Siltanen & Partners

Quiznos oven now driving guys into therapy

We haven't seen the talking Quiznos oven since it was propositioning an employee in this ad. But it's come back to haunt another guy's therapy session in this spot for the Toasty Bullet sandwich. This guy's obsessed with the six-inch sandwiches, which I guess is more respectable than the previous dude's foot-long meat-tube habit, but still. Both men need to start setting some serious boundaries with the oven, before there's too much psychological damage to undo. Unless, of course, Quiznos is paying their psychiatric bills, in which case it all comes out in the wash.

—Posted by David Kiefaber

See also:
Quiznos aims its Toasty Bullet squarely at moochers
Quiznos oven craving some foot-long lovin'

Published on August 20, 2009 | Permalink | Comments (1)
Filed under Food and drink, Kiefaber, Quiznos, Restaurants

Quiznos oven craving some foot-long lovin'

Say what you will about the disturbing implications of this Quiznos ad from Nitro, but you'd be hard-pressed to forget the point: that Quiznos has foot-long meat tubes just waiting to be jammed in the hotbox for you. Oh, and they're $4. The talent deserves credit for squeezing a lot of subtle acting into a 30-second space. If you don't believe me, check out the guy's reaction when the oven says, "Put it in me, Scott." If those aren't the eyebrows of a man being propositioned by a horny appliance, I don't know what are. UPDATE: A slightly sanitized, less sexualized version of the ad is airing in earlier timeslots.

—Posted by David Griner

Published on March 25, 2009 | Permalink | Comments (65)
Filed under Griner, Nitro, Quiznos, Restaurants

More madness from Spongmonkeys creator

Joel Veitch, creator of the Spongmonkeys, the malformed rats that sang for Quiznos, is back with this spot for Crusha, which is some sort of milkshake mix in the U.K.

—Posted by Tim Nudd

Published on January 18, 2007 | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)
Filed under Quiznos

Quiznos finally sends Baby Bob packing

Quiznos has a new marketing campaign that carries the tagline “Eat up” and focuses on something called a Flatbread Chopped Salad, which is apparently so good that it will be served, if you can believe it, with a “real metal fork.” But the real welcome news here is that Baby Bob has been fired. The lascivious talking toddler, who anchored Quiznos’ ads since January 2005, is “out of the picture,” confirms the press release. Bob’s ignominious demise follows a career of ups and downs. He began as a dot-com star, advertising FreeInternet.com. After the crash, he had his own sitcom on CBS. Then he displaced the Spongmonkeys as Quiznos’ ad spokesman. Through it all, he never ceased to annoy and creep out viewers. He still has his own corner on the Quiznos Web site, but hopefully that’s just an oversight. Quiznos once proudly remarked that Bob “blends baby appeal with a sophisticated 40-year-old personality.” How that’s meant to be appealing in any way remains a mystery.

—Posted by Tim Nudd

Published on June 5, 2006 | Permalink | Comments (9)
Filed under Quiznos

At least it’s not a Spongmonkey card

This Mother’s Day, Quiznos is offering an alternative to the traditional card and chocolates cliché, ’cause that’s so yesterday. For moms out there who just can’t get enough of Baby Bob, Quiznos’ talking “celebrity spokesbaby” and former sitcom star, direct your attention to the company’s Web site, where you can craft your own e-mail greeting from frisky Robert. A picture and pre-recorded message from the tike provide an alternative to “over-priced flowers” and “silly greeting cards,” according to the company. Says Quiznos: Bob “blends baby appeal with a sophisticated 40-year-old personality.” Again, we ask: And that’s a good thing?

—Posted by Lisa van der Pool

Published on April 21, 2005 | Permalink | Comments (2)
Filed under Quiznos

Spongmonkeys, R.I.P.

With the demise of the Quiznos/Martin Agency relationship, we are mourning the loveable, bug-eyed, misshapen, guitar-playing, moon-loving, rat-like Spongmonkeys.

It remains a bit of a mystery how Martin sold through a national campaign starring these disturbing little Joel Veich creations. In an entertaining column in Slate last winter, Seth Stevenson hinted at some of the confusion among viewers as to what the hell these things were. Stevenson wrote: “In your mail to me, you’ve called them: gerbils with birth defects; Mr. Potato Rats; drug-addled, castrato hamsters; and ‘hell lemurs’ (which, while catchy, is not really accurate, as the lemur body type is far more ectomorphic). Whatever they are, they’re clearly Photoshopped, and if pressed I would say the base element is a pygmy marmoset.”

Yet Stevenson (and many others) found the Spongmonkeys to be great ad characters. “Grade: A,” he wrote. “You’re either gonna give this one an A or an F, and I respect those of you who go with F. The spongmonkeys are no doubt divisive characters. But what can I say? I love the subs!”

“As we look into 2005, we weren’t quite connecting,” claims the CMO at Quiznos. For the next campaign, did Martin want to use Veich’s Sumo Florist or something?

—Posted by Tim Nudd

Published on December 6, 2004 | Permalink | Comments (0)
Filed under Quiznos