Get superhuman strength with bottled water

Ever need to carry around really heavy stuff like racehorses and houses? Who hasn't!? If you're in France, Vittel bottled water can help, according to a new campaign from Ogilvy Paris (with production company Henry de Czar and director Lionel Goldstein). See all three TV spots here. The ads have some drawbacks. The "It must be the water" message is derivative. (Plus, why must it be the water? There's nothing in water.) The soundtracks are appalling: These French songs would suck in any language. And the house in that one commercial seems a bit too obviously phony. (Maybe it's made of gingerbread. I like the festive notion of gingerbread, but it's too sweet, tastes like crap.) However, the ad below, with the riders carrying the horses, rocks! Damn, those nags look like the real deal! They almost seem to be smiling, enjoying the ultimate equine revenge. Don't kid yourself. They'd turn us into dog food and glue if they could.

—Posted by David Gianatasio

Published on December 3, 2009 | Permalink | Comments (1)
Filed under Europe, Gianatasio, Ogilvy, Water

Cut back on watering the really stupid grass

Sukle Advertising + Design has a new conservation campaign for hometown client Denver Water that asks people to curtail their lawn watering by two minutes a day. You'll get away with this, the ads suggest, because "grass is dumb" and won't know the difference. The work includes quote bubbles stuck in the ground that reveal the depths of grass's stupidity, and a couple of TV commercials (the one below and this other one) in which a few personified blades fail to grasp even the basics of the reality that surrounds them. Sukle's "Use only what you need" campaign has been down this road before, of course, with the pretty great drunk-flowers spot.

—Posted by Tim Nudd

Published on July 29, 2009 | Permalink | Comments (2)
Filed under Nudd, Sukle, Water

Bottled water is the most evil thing on earth

The anti-bottled-water project known as Tappening has unveiled a campaign in which it tells lies about bottled water in order to illuminate the supposed dishonesty in the category's marketing and make a case for drinking tap water instead. If you had trouble following that last sentence, don't bother with the campaign, because it's even more confusing. Basically, Tappening makes outrageous negative claims about bottled water (at one point saying it's "2% polar bear tears"), then admits it's lying, which is supposed to somehow cast tap water in a favorable light. Whaaa? The whole premise is self-defeating. If you're going to use ads to make your case, it's unwise to point out that ads sometimes lie. What's worse, they offer no real reason to favor tap water. The folks at ad agency DiMassimo Goldstein should steer clear of the kitchen faucet—that swill has clearly rotted away their ability to think clearly and express themselves in a coherent manner.

—Posted by David Gianatasio

Published on July 27, 2009 | Permalink | Comments (6)
Filed under DiMassimo Goldstein, Gianatasio, Tappening, Water

WaterPartners puts dirty in clean-water PSA

This faux bottled-water spot, created as a PSA by the clean-water advocates at WaterPartners, probably tries a bit too hard to be funny, and the fake-ad setup is old hat. Still, the actress is committed, as she lets the sludge (called "L'Desh Fresh") dribble down her face. This is "the world's most authentic water," the polluted stuff with "arsenic-enhanced flavor" and "smooth urine undertones" that millions use for drinking, bathing and food preparation every day. The clip has only a few thousand views on YouTube. Maybe they should've had the stuff eat through her chin. Or better yet, that dress! Just to drive some traffic. WaterPartners just teamed up with Matt Damon to form Water.org. Maybe Matt can explain that sex sells.

—Posted by David Gianatasio

Published on July 16, 2009 | Permalink | Comments (2)
Filed under Gianatasio, Parody, PSAs, Water

Evian unleashes a brigade of rollerbabies

It's been over a decade since that damned dancing baby was all over the Internet, but Evian is convinced that people around the world still thirst for computer-animated cuteness. Thus we have the roller diaper derby above, which you can expect to have e-mailed to you by half the grandparents you know with a subject line like "Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: So cute!!!" Via Presurfer.

—Posted by David Griner

Published on July 6, 2009 | Permalink | Comments (3)
Filed under Evian, Griner, Water

Zach Braff is asking you to drink the water

Whom would you choose to be the voice of water? Pur Water Filtration Systems has gone with Zach Braff. In a trippy new campaign from TBWA\Chiat\Day, the scruffy actor says things like, "I'm water. I shouldn't be trapped in a bottle. I've got things to do. Trees to grow. Thirsts to quench." Well, he was on Scrubs, and scrubbing is water related. Plus, Braff often looks like he could use a bath. Still, the concept sounds more like a method-acting exercise ("OK, you're water. Happy water! Now ... sad water!") than a marketing strategy. Eric Yaverbaum, co-founder of Tappening, gets all lathered up talking about the Pur ads in Brandweek: "The bottled water backlash is hitting a fever pitch." Yeah, it's a major election-year issue, if Tappening's pro-tap-water campaign can be believed. I think they've been listening a bit too closely to what they're faucets have to say. Most of us prefer a more common-sense approach: If there's something in the water and it starts talking, just get out of the house!

—Posted by David Gianatasio

Published on September 29, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (3)
Filed under Gianatasio, Pur, Water