Make your kids pay: Get 'em in commercials

Here's a fun Friday-afternoon video courtesy of Everything Is Terrible: a lesson on how to get your kids in commercials. They're not doing anything useful, so you might as well exploit them. Sure, they'll need some training, but the guy in the video has the right idea: "It's like a polo pony. You gotta beat a polo pony to run out after a ball. It's not natural for it to do it. But if you can find a horse that does it, he becomes a good polo pony. You've gotta do the same thing with a child." Sage advice. Via Cynical-C.

—Posted by Tim Nudd

Published on April 3, 2009 | Permalink | Comments (0)
Filed under Nudd, Youth

Breaking news: TV not that great for babies

Confirming what most of us probably knew all along, researchers at Children's Hospital in Boston and Harvard Medical School have concluded that having babies and toddlers watch TV and DVDs won't make them any smarter. They report that products like Baby Genius, Brainy Baby and Baby Einstein "have no benefits" in terms of educational value. They do greatly benefit the folks who make and market the merchandise, of course. Dr. Michael Rich, a co-author of the new study, tells CNN: "At the very best, they steal time from much more productive cognitive developmental activities." I can only assume he means video games, online social networking and blogging, which is how most of us adults fill our idle hours. We also watch a lot of American Idol, but that can't hurt grownups, because our brain cells are already dead. Am I right? Photo: texasgurl on Flickr.

—Posted by David Gianatasio

Published on March 5, 2009 | Permalink | Comments (1)
Filed under Gianatasio, Research, Youth

Oh hey, it's another virtual world for tweens

Tween Brands Inc. and Philadelphia ad agency Red Tettemer have spewed forth yet another tween virtual world, just a few weeks after Disney XD burst onto the scene. This one's dying by design. ScapeNation is your standard build-an-avatar, play-games, win-points world, but with a twist: It's being destroyed by "The Darkness," and it's up to you to save it. When I signed up, ScapeNation assured me that I'll "want to play, like, all the time!" After a few games, I had earned 16 ScapeBucks, but when I went to buy stuff, I found out the merest T-shirt starts at 400! Which made me, like, not want to play at all. So, I spent the next hour thwarting the parental controls. You can't say "I am a banana!" or use the word "cake," but vajayjay, masturbation and nutsack somehow escaped the no-no list. ScapeNation is still a bit pretty limp in terms of content, too. Like Bella Sara, they have trading cards. Like Club Penguin, they're targeting both boys and girls. But if it's true that the players really can choose to save the world or let it die, then they've really got something different. Still, 400 ScapeBucks for a T-shirt in this economy?

—Posted by Rebecca Cullers

Published on March 3, 2009 | Permalink | Comments (0)
Filed under Cullers, Red Tettemer, Youth

Paul Rudd barely survives a mentoring PSA

Apparently as punishment for playing a terrible Big Brother in the crap sandwich film Role Models, Paul Rudd had done this PSA for Big Brothers Big Sisters. The star of films such as Clueless, Anchorman and The 40 Year Old Virgin says Big Brothers Big Sisters is no laughing matter. I'd believe him if it weren't obvious that this was take No. 28 and that he ruined takes 1 through 27 by cracking up. He barely contains it in the final cut: You've seen that smirk before in Forgetting Sarah Marshall and Reno 911! And you know what comes next—the ultra-sarcastic laugh that makes you want to punch him in the nose until it bleeds Big Brother blood. So, ignore Paul Rudd, but check out Big Brothers Big Sisters anyway.

—Posted by Jeremy Greenfield

Published on November 13, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (6)
Filed under Big Brothers Big Sisters, Greenfield, PSAs, Youth

He'll save the day right after this cigarette

Utah's Department of Health has a new anti-smoking campaign courtesy of Crowell Advertising that targets boys 12 and under. To appeal to these pre-teens, Crowell created a superhero called Smokerman. A pack-a-day kinda guy, Smokerman is "the one who can't." In the five low-budget but fairly amusing spots, Smokerman fails to save the world again and again due to his unfortunate habit. The press release says the goal is to appeal to kids without spouting statistics, but a couple of them slip in there. Did you know every cigarette takes 11 minutes off your life? How do they even come up with numbers like that? Also, it should be noted that, for a glorified Ken doll, Smokerman is surprisingly hot. Way hotter than Powerman, with his weird logo and tacky neon-green outfit, or Speedyman, with his atrocious '80s hair and freaky goggles. With a fine 'stache like that, you just know Smokerman kicks ass. I hope they start selling the dolls. I want one to sit on my desk and stare blankly at me each time I go to chop another 11 minutes off my life.

—Posted by Rebecca Cullers

Published on November 12, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (9)
Filed under Anti-smoking, Crowell, Cullers, PSAs, Youth

Can't the 'We' campaigns all just get along?

My schizophrenic generation, alternately called Gen Y, Echo Boomers, Millennials or Generation Me, might have finally settled on a name for itself. Or at least, it's been given another one: Generation WE. That's the title of Eric Greenberg's new book, and his first promotional video for it, "Generation WE: The Movement Begins" (above), premiered last week and is well on its way to a million views. For a billionaire boomer still enamored with the potential power of youth action, Greenberg puts on a pretty stirring show. Despite the long running time (4:45), the video caused an unexpected stirring of idealism from deep within my cynical heart. Furthermore, Greenberg seems rather invested in this pet project, releasing the entire book for free online and funding a political action site set to drop in early 2009. It's just this "WE" name that gets me. Another rich boomer, Al Gore, has his own "We" campaign, demanding action on the climate crisis, and they're nearing 2 million young recruits. If only they could somehow put aside their differences and join their campaigns together. ... But if I know my wealthy boomers, it's always my political action Web site, my book deal, my pet philanthropy project—just me, me, me.

—Posted by Rebecca Cullers

Published on October 31, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (1)
Filed under Cullers, Youth

Tweens take a shine to virtual advertising

Virtual Worlds News commissioned a report from Dubit Research on the virtual habits of 7- to 12-year-olds, and discovered some interesting implications for advertisers. Of 600 tweens surveyed, 73 percent said they belonged to a virtual world, with 43 percent palling around at Disney's Club Penguin and 27 percent hanging at Habbo Hotel. The proliferation numbers are similar to those reported by the under-12 demographic in Nielsen's summer survey (PDF link) of 40,000 British Internet users under 23—though Stardoll was leading that survey, followed by Club Penguin. More important, the Dubit study included ad questions, noting that 45 percent of kids playing in virtual worlds noticed advertisements and sponsorships. Of those who noticed, their reaction was surprisingly positive. On a scale of 1 to 5, with 5 being the most positive feelings, 70 percent rated virtual brand presence either a 4 (just under 30 percent) or a 5 (just over 40 percent). Ah, impressionable youth! The mounting influence of virtual worlds on tweens was one of the reasons CosmoGirl cited in calling it quits (and keeping their Web site up). But do virtual brand experiences equal offline sales? Disney's Club Penguin hopes so. Its new line of toys is coming out next week, and each one comes with a code coin to unlock special items online. Despite the threat of online predators around every corner, the steady march of virtual branding to tweens waddles on.

—Posted by Rebecca Cullers

Published on October 20, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (1)
Filed under Cullers, Digital, Youth

Is time running out for tween magazines?

CosmoGirl is spitting out its last issue this December. With magazine sales falling off a cliff and more young girls choosing Cosmo itself over its sexless tween counterpart, CosmoGirl's ad pages dropped 14.5 percent in the first half of 2008. So, Hearst is cutting its losses and focusing on Seventeen. But don't worry, there won't be a sudden dearth of Jonas Brothers coverage. The CosmoGirl Web site is still raking in the ad bucks and will remain online. In fact, tween content has been steadily growing online through cheaper-than-print virtual worlds like Neopets and Club Penguin. Disney's Club Penguin Times, a fake online weekly, is more widely read than a lot of U.S. newspapers. And of course, we can't forget the crazy-popular Stardoll site. Last week, Elle U.K. announced that it'll be launching Stardoll magazine. Elle Girl's own print edition crashed and burned in 2006, but they've also thrived online, so Cosmo Girl might learn a thing or two from them about how to survive in the new tween landscape. Clearly, it takes more than a three-page spread of your most mortifying moments.

—Posted by Rebecca Cullers

Published on October 13, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (1)
Filed under Cullers, Magazines, Youth

Be everything, thanks to Boys & Girls Clubs

This McCann spot for the Boys & Girls Clubs of America has some cool visual elements in it, but the director has the attention span of a hummingbird. Maybe they should have added "Be able to keep up with our frenetic pacing" to that list of cue cards. I think a line drawing of a dinosaur vomited up the word fearless at one point, but it's all a blur otherwise. Still, kudos to an ad that has something positive and relevant to say. Also, check out the "Be Great" Web site.

—Posted by David Kiefaber

Published on September 29, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (2)
Filed under BGCA, Kiefaber, Youth